A sermon by Senior Minister John B. McCall, January 18, 2009
Matthew 12:46-50
Today’s message is offered on this Diversity Sunday by three members of our congregation who remind us of the words with which we open worship at each service: “No matter who you are, or where you are on life’s jounrey, you are welcome here.”
John McCall
All Kinds of Families! That’s the theme our Diversity Committee chose for today. It’s timely and topical. It makes headlines and causes many people to feel vulnerable or threatened. Some feel there’s an attack on traditional marriage and traditional family. They want to quote scripture and tell some people that they’re pleasing to God and tell others they’re not.
Today’s scripture lesson was widely quoted by those in the first century Christian community. The reason was simple: many of the people who heard Jesus and who believed his message, and who were baptized, and who followed him, were renounced by their families of origin. They became spiritual orphans because they were drawn to the New Life Jesus offered.{Interpretation – Matthew, Douglas R. A. Hare, pg. 145}
This reading makes it clear that Jesus’ family is not defined by biology – who’s related to whom; not defined by Christology – who has a lofty opinion about Jesus’ meaning and purpose. He defines his family by ethics – who does the right thing in the name and spirit of God. Wise people across the ages have written volumes about the meaning of family. But I don’t think they can do better than this.
Today it’s a great joy for me to welcome three members of our church who have found a home here – a spiritual home, and a family. Each has a story to share.
Pam Herrmann
Good morning. My name is Pam Herrmann. I was born on January 13th, a lucky day for me as I was placed in a loving home. I was born at 2:30 am to a divorced woman who did not know how she could care for her child. My cousin was her nurse and told her that she had an aunt and uncle who were looking to adopt a baby and provide the love and care needed to raise a child. So she gave her baby to them, and at 9:30 am on the same day I was home with my parents who were 41 and 42 years old at the time.
I grew up in a duplex in Brewer, Maine. My father’s brother and family lived on the other side. My father’s sister converted the small garage into a home so I grew up literally surrounded by family. I always knew that I was adopted, but never considered it out of the ordinary. My mother quit a three pack a day smoking habit the day I was born saying that she did not want to drop ashes on her baby. She never smoked another cigarette. I was wanted, loved, and accepted.
My father was a traveling salesman and was away from Monday morning until Friday night every week. He worked hard to provide for his family. When I was 10 years old, we went to New York City for a week. We visited all the sights including Yankee Stadium which is why I always say I’ve been a Yankee fan since I was 10 years old.
This was the ONLY vacation I can ever remember my father taking. Shortly after we returned, my father had his first heart attack. He was very worried about his family so he made a personal pact with God. He prayed let me be okay and I’ll be a better Christian attending church every Sunday. My father recovered and attended church every Sunday – sitting in the very back pew, except one Sunday when he was shipwrecked off the coast of Jonesport.
While at College I met and married my husband Dick. We’ve been married for 43 years. Our daughter Cheryl and her husband Scott live in Michigan with our two grandchildren. Our other Daughter Kim still lives with us, an arrangement that works out well for all of us. Kim is an occupational therapist, and we often call her Doctor Kim, as she’s always there to help and advise us on the aches and pains of senior living.
Dick and I both love baseball, but we usually root for different teams. The last few years we’ve been able to go to Florida in March to see some spring training games – the fulfillment of a dream for both of us. Dick always says to me when we’re at the ballpark, “I’m so glad you like baseball”. Of course, I’m glad he likes baseball too. It doesn’t matter that he likes the Red Sox and I like the Yankees, we love the sport of baseball.
My friends That’s the way it is at our church too. We love each other and may disagree on an issue from time to time, but because we love each other we can’t let a difference of opinion spoil the strong bond we have at this church. Our unity and faith is much stronger through our differences, but we love the same God and believe that no matter who we are or where we are on life’s journey, we can worship together here.
Because I’m an adopted child, I’m naturally “a right to life” person. Most of you are probably “Pro Choice”. But I’m glad I still feel accepted into this church family. Our diversity makes us stronger. And our circle is so big that it doesn’t exclude anyone. I would not want to belong to a church that was exclusive. I want to be here with all of you, with all our differences. It makes my life better.
One Palm Sunday My husband and our two children attended church in Chatham, Mass while visiting my Mother-in-law. They served communion and both of our children participated. What a commotion this caused! My mother-in -law received phone calls, that her grandchildren took communion before they were confirmed ( my children were 10 and 12 at the time). I belong to this church because all are welcome to share the communion cup, no one is excluded.
Exclusion of any kind is wrong. We need each other. We love each other. We are a church family that stays together and prays together. Our faith in God keeps us together. We struggle to follow the ways of Christ together. Only together can we make it through the ups and downs life has to offer.
Thank you for being here. We cannot be a strong church without you. This church is strong because of each and every one of you.
I met Maxine Wright over twenty years ago at a neighbor’s house. We soon discovered that we were both adopted. We also found out that neither of us had any brothers or sisters so we decided to be each other’s sister. Maxine often jokes that she’s the much older sister and provides wisdom, and advice to me just like an older sister would do. Later we discovered that we both belonged to this church so we began sitting together on Sundays like “families” sometimes do.
One week when Maxine was not able to attend church, I sat in the pew behind Fred Howard and his daughter Carol. Fred turned around and said to me: “You know you don’t have to sit in the pew behind us. You can sit in the pew with us.” I, of course, quickly joined them. Boy did that small gesture make me feel good! I felt wanted and accepted. I felt like I belonged. This church is strong because it is full of Fred Howards! We can’t just say that no matter who you are or where you are on life’s journey you are welcome here. We have to show it.
God Bless you all.
Mike Kasputes
Good morning. When I was asked to speak about family today I was a bit at a loss for words ….quite a rarity for a writer. My challenge was in grasping what family means to me. When I think of the word family, I sense a warm and secure feeling. And just like with the word hope, we all ‘know’ what family is in our own unique and special way.
I was blessed with wonderful parents and a wonderful sister. And while they’ve been in heaven for about 20 years now, I still share and feel their love every single day. For me the core to family is love and acceptance. Family doesn’t just tolerate each other, but rather accepts each other for who we are.
I came to this church on Meeting House Hill for the first time, a year ago last December. It was a time of deep grief in my life, when a man who I love very dearly had chosen to leave the life that we had created together. When I arrived here, I think only one person had met me before, so it’s fair to say that no one knew I was gay. I took a seat at the back of the church. You see, I’m quite introverted by nature. In fact my Myers-Briggs personality evaluation labels me an INFJ, placing me in a pool of about 1% of the population… a result which made me feel a bit more weird or queer in life, than being gay.
But as I sat in that back pew on that cold December morning, I noticed a card of paper which talked about the open and affirming position of this congregation. That little slip of paper made me feel a bit more confident that maybe I was in the right place. And then John McCall welcomed the congregation to worship with some of the nicest words I had heard in many days, ‘That no matter who you are or where you are on life’s journey, you are always welcome here’. After so much grief, I began to feel a little accepted again. I was with a group of loving people sharing in the word of God and the love of God’s presence in our lives.
I am very appreciative for your open arms, open minds, and open hearts.
Karen Westerberg
For those who don’t know me, I’m Karen Westerberg, and I’ve been a member of this church for 10 years.
I actually came here for the first time in 1992, when I was living in Hollis. I was trying to deal with the fact that my husband was an alcoholic, and someone recommended the Top of the Hill Alanon meetings held here every Saturday morning. Although it was 23 miles from home, I made the drive almost every Saturday for the next two years. I remember thinking what a great church this must be to open its doors to weekly AA and Alanon groups.
When my sons and I moved to South Portland, we started coming to church services and Sunday School here. At first, I was overwhelmed by the size of the congregation, having come from a church of less than 100 people. I decided the best way to meet people was to join a group or committee, and soon found myself joining the Diversity Committee….. even before I joined the church. I was part of the original group that presented the ONA statement to the congregation, and it was the first time I felt what a wonderful church family I had found.
As a single parent, I wanted to find a man to spend some time with each of my sons. When we were turned down by Big Brothers because my sons both have Asperger’s, I turned to the church for help. In no time at all, Bonnie Steinroeder contacted me with a name: Bill Harris. It was truly a match made in heaven. As the parent of two boys himself, Bill realized the importance of kids having one-on-one time with adults, so he did things with just Nick and just Alex.
Like all families, we have our ups and downs, our disagreements, but we are able to work things out. When all is said and done, we still love each other.
John McCall
So… what is a family?
Some will say it’s one man and one woman, with a marriage license from the state, and their biological children. Period.
Some would expand their view a little and add extended family and adopted children to the circle. Period.
How about this: a true family is a circle of mutual love and trust and respect where two or more people share life’s joys and sorrows. That’s true of the church. And I think it’s an ideal for most of us. Jesus said to the biblical literalist: “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers and sisters?”
And pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here they are! For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”
All kinds of families… but if we’re doing the will of God, we’re truly one family. And what is God’s will? Micah said it: do justice; love kindness and walk with God in humility.